and so our boy grows wings and learns to fly...

"dumb as a stump and doomed as hell, but you've got heart." - joe meno, how the hula girl sings

the polyphonic spree - light & day/reach for the sun

i know, this doesn't seem real. it's so absurd. not only this picture but everything leading up to it. how i got to be here. standing bare-assed & buck-naked at the grand canyon. i look like a disproportionate wood nymph in front of a phony CGI backdrop. well, that's me!

"somebody come out here and give me a hug!"

notice the long johns still wrapped around my ankles - my favorite part of the picture. i tried as best i could to get them off, but i was perilously hopping on a perch over the grand canyon. falling in wasn't what i had in mind. though i could never wish for a finer, more suitable death than slipping bare-ass and backwards into the grand canyon with my long johns wrapped around my ankles. one day discovered on the canyon floor - "poor kid, never had a chance... was wearing long johns."

i'm guessing you probably think i'm crazy to have done all this and to now post it online for the world to see. either that, or i've got one helluva pair of ginormous balls (not so evident in this picture). i did, and do, have doubts about this. but i am proud of where i've been and what i've done. proud to have pictures to show for it. and this is a crowning achievement. the pinnacle of the absurdity, of which, is my life.

but, of course, i have thought of the consequences of posting such nude photos of myself online:

1. my mom is going to have multiple heart attacks at once. someone call 911.
2. i will never be elected to public office. nor will my one day future wife. that one stings.
3. this is going to become everyone's desktop background. glad to be of service.

and yes, i guess chippendales did come early this year.



*to explain a certain small thing: approx. temperature at time of filming - 19 degrees farenheit. not to mention the wind chill...

arcade fire - cold wind (blowing)